Many times we hold on to a relationship simply because it’s comfortable. It doesn’t require work. It’s become complacent. It is financially secure. It’s a structure. And, while we may not be “happy” we have trained our mind to believe we are “content”. Nothing changes, it’s predictable. Sorta like the sun setting every day: we don’t have to be concerned about what might happen. There is a complacency in the KNOWN and fear resides in the UNKNOWN.
I have been observing two baby deer that were born late last spring. Momma deer gave birth to them on the property behind me. It’s completely closed in with fencing. I look at it as a huge playpen for the babies. There is plenty of room for them to romp and play and the fencing keeps predators out. As they have grown, I knew there would come a day when Momma deer would show them both how to leap over the fence, just as she has done so gracefully. Sure enough, the one day has arrived.
I then noticed that one was left behind. Could it be that she is too afraid to take the leap? I realized there was a huge metaphor in my own back yard just waiting for me to interpret. The one that has chosen to stay behind wanders around, grazing & sleeping. I catch her staring off looking for Momma and her brother. They come to visit her, but she is insisting on staying her ground. Her FEAR is preventing her from being with her loved ones, and she is quite alone.
As I pondered this, I drew the conclusion that staying in a loveless, predictable relationship is very much the same as choosing to be alone. You prevent yourself from experiencing new and wonderful things. Just as baby deer appears to be content with NOT taking the “leap” I can’t help but feel that she would experience so much more joy with her mom and sibling.
The acronym for FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real. We can concoct all forms of justification why we insist on staying stuck. I always believe that because we are heart-centered spiritual beings; when we follow our hearts – get our heads out of the way, the Universe will embrace our courage. You will be taken care of.
Our “job” is merely to focus on the “what” part of our desire. The Universe will provide the “how” and ensure that you are provided for. Is it scary to trust something that is so uncertain and unknown? Of course it is. You are human. However, do you want to continue to live a “safe” life without joy and real happiness? The trade off is your choice.